a short trip to Greenland and Iceland
Tan Wee Cheng, Singapore/LondonMap of Iceland
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Iceland:
Hunting for Huge Penises and Having a
Puffin Party
Sent: 09 August 2001
Hunting for HUGE Penises and Having a Puffin Party
Size matters. It's a magnificent thing, uncut, a little wrinkled from age
and frequency of use, but still impressive and fully erect at almost all times.
It must have been most fertile and powerful in its hey days, and a conqueror of
many birds, so to speak. Well, at 6 foot, the cock of a sperm whale is taller
than me and greets visitors to the Icelandic Phallological Museum in Reykjavik,
also premises of the Icelandic Phallological Institute, i.e., Penis Museum -
perhaps the only of its kind in the world. Here one sees the penises of the
whale, dolphin, giraffe, bull, etc - guess what, all much larger and longer than
that of the human. Only one creature is missing here - that of the homo sapien,
but the museum is proud to announce that a kind Icelander, currently in its
70’s, has kindly pledged to donate his to the museum upon his decease. So much
for completeness.
I reached Reykjavik 3pm local time on Tuesday. Almost couldn’t get onto
the flight as something had screwed up my booking and I had to be placed on the
waiting list instead. Even then I should consider myself lucky that the plane
did fly after all. The sole air controller of East Greenland had recovered from
his flu, and restored the region’s links with the outside world. I was the
last to board the plane, and got up after everyone had already boarded. I had
barely boarded the plane when it took off. And I saw the last of Greenland,
those magnificent snow-covered mountains, endless glaciers and countless
floating icebergs, the latter like stars in the sky, only that they were in the
sea.
Upon arrival, I rushed to see the giant penises, passing by the
phallus-shaped dome of the Hallgrimskirkja Church (OK, now everything in
Reykjavik looks like penises...), and walked around the nice old town. So
pleasant and easy. The weather was gorgeous, after the stirring cold of
Greenland. Founded in 874 AD by
Ingolfur Arnarson, yet another Norwegian Viking outlawed in his homeland and
forced to flee westwards (hey, the Americans were just continuing the traditions
of the first Europeans who reach the Americas - OK, apologies to the Spanish and
Italians, but the Scandinavians reached the Americas first). Arnarson saw land
and threw his pillars (no idea what’s meant by that. They might be
phallus-shaped too) overboard and they floated onshore where Arnarson decided
this was his destiny. Here he founded Reykjavik, or Smoky Bay.
This is a nice city where everybody speaks better world English than the
blokes in East London, York (OK, they are Scandinavians of some sort who don´t
speak good English) or Glasgow (just watch Trainspotting). They are also liberal
and freedom-loving - they were the first to recognise Lithuanian independence,
well before the anti-Gorbachev coup occurred; and posters, brochures (yes,
distributed by the tourist office) and rainbow flags proclaim the gay pride
parade the coming weekend - this would have shocked more conservative tourists
from Taleban Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia and the Christian right in Bible Belt USA
and yes, my dear old Singapore.
Here I continued my gastronomical adventure by looking for puffin meat,
supposedly an Icelandic delicacy - apologies to my animal/bird lover friends. I
love cute creatures like the puffin, and that´s why I make them part of me. Had
some initial difficulty finding one that serve puffin, but eventually found them
at an upmarket restaurant, with French-style service and Icelandic cuisine (no
contradictions here). I chose the most exotic item in the menu, something
quaintly named Puffin Party. Here´s
the three course meal at about US$40 before wine:
- Fresh salad with marinated puffin carpaccio and smoked & cured
Puffin with orange vinaigrette
- Puffin with honey-glaced vegetables with creamed roqfortcheese sauce
- Granny´s home baked skyr cake with blue berries sorbet
Puffins taste great. A kind of red meat with little fat. Tougher than
chicken but tender than beef. Wonderful!
Tjorn - the pond in the middle of Reykjavik, a spot of serenity in a quiet capital
This morning, I flew northeast to Akureyri, Iceland´s 2nd largest city
with only 14,000 people. Even then, this tiny city has an university and a
symphony orchestra - yet another indication of the Icelandic level of human
development, one of the highest in the world. I have an interesting day today,
visiting various volcanic and natural formations in this land of fire and ice
that lies on the fault line of two major land plates. I will write more. In the
mean time, have a wonderful mid-week!
WeeCheng
Northeast Iceland & Reykjavik: Having a rotten shark for dinner after a whale watching fiasco
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